Monday, January 28, 2008

Flying?? That shits for the birds...

As I sit here at work shuffling between quotes and orders alike, I use the downtime to get my daily dose of the web. I move from gossip site to ESPN to hip-hop sites and finally the good ole' CNN.com. I guess you could criticize the fact that I go from Hollywood bullshit to sports and music before the news, but that just shows how comfortable I have become. In turn, I found an article showing how lax we as a society have become. So, to get to the point, I came across an article about the Transportation Security Administration (TSA) getting the proverbial long stroke (similar to that of Ron Jeremy) when an undercover government agent successfully smuggled a fake bomb onto an airplane. Maybe the overweight hood rich broad at the x-ray machine should have payed more attention to the job rather then her 2 inch finger nails. I bet if the agent had a Gucci bag, she would have noticed. Nevertheless, the whole increased airport security idea was fucked from jump street. I mean, with the amount of civil liberty enthusiast in addition to a well publicized "non profiling" policy of the agency, how in the fuck can we expect the security to be worth a shit. I've seen far better security at the NYC clubs, and far better policies for that matter. Sadly, the larger majority of people fail to realize that the same freedoms we cherish, are the same reasons we are so prime for the picking. Had this been a real attempt by a real terrorist, shit would be all over the news. Because it wasn't, we will continue to think shit is sweet and check on whether Britney Spears's vagina was exposed again.

Short and sweet today, like a midget with a fudge-pop. Bottom line is: if you are thinking about flying, you may want to consider greyhound. If we were meant to fly, we'd a been given wings. I know the overwhelming statistics showing air travel as the safest way to travel, but anyone ever meet a survivor of an airplane crash? I'm just saying.

FYI: Link to britneys vag. Looks like someone left a roastbeef sandwich in the summer sun for a week....
http://www.idontlikeyouinthatway.com/2006/11/britney-spears-is-photogenic.html

PS - i'd still hit!

Thursday, January 24, 2008

Dumb Rappers Need Teaching

What is the deal with all these dumb fucking rappers? Too dumb to realize that the Five-O is hawkin'. Publicity stunts? I doubt it. Most of these jack-offs (see Lil Wayne or TI) will spend at least some time locked down. And rightfully so. I don't think they should be allowed to stay in the vision of the impressionable youth. They gave that privilege up when they were too stupid to distance themselves from the bullshit. I don't want to hate, but I feel obligated as a Hip-Hop fan to speak my mind. I know we shouldn't expect too much from them, it's not like a high school diploma or college education was ever a logical step in the path of rap super stardom, but fuck. I heard an interview with the rapper Plies when I was down in Florida, and this clown might be one of the dumbest cats out there. Just listening to him speak was a struggle to any reasonably educated person. Then, one of my dude's pointed me to a VIBE interview he did. LMAO:

When asked about his name the rapper responded: "Plies is a tool, You can use it to put the squeeze on things, like I'm doing to these n*ggas in the rap game. I got the squeeze on them real tight, they feeling the pressure, or you can use it to pull things out. I pull out all the bullsh*t and keep the real you feel me? It also a word you can use in terms of things goin' on in yo life, ya dig. You may hear something I say and say that it plies to me. Plies straight to me."

Vibe: "I've heard of a tool called a Pliers and the term applies."

Plies: "You know what I'm trying to say my n*gga, just buy my album, I'm from the South my n*gga, we don't learn no grammar. My Album out August 7, 2007, cop three copies each, it's Christmas in July fo' real, ya dig? "

This is a perfect example of the "artists" filling the ipods of today's youth. You would think that if you were going to be known by a name, you would at least want it to be accurate enough that the general population could see the correlation between the slang variation you're using and the actual word, but maybe not. People in the south are a little slow and supposedly, they don't learn no grammar.


So, according to his verse on his "daddy's" song "100 Million dollars", Lil Wayne says "I all night it, I everyday it". Evidently, the DEA and Arizona Piggies figured he would be riding dirty when they stopped him the other day. After all, he does "everyday it". My question is, if you have "100 Million dollars" why not pay a flunky to carry your creative inspiration and thus, avoid these legal complications? But why attempt to decipher the thoughts of a fake blood who kisses men? It's like trying to shit in the kitchen sink. It makes me wonder what would cause someone who is currently on top of the game, despite his quasi-homoerotic escapades and drug induced drooling on half his appearance's, to have such a lapse in judgment. I am not saying that Wayne is even educated enough to understand the ramifications of his actions, but you think someone in his camp would be at least semi-paranoid about the bacon wagons.

This rap shit is like a real life version of the Dave Chappelle episode of "when keeping it real goes wrong". We all know that the listening community likes to correlate the street credibility of these rappers with the persona they portray on their records, but does that make it necessary? Is being a G the only way to talk about G shit? And if you really think about it, wouldn't the cat without the criminal record or gang affiliation be the more gangsta one? I mean, since when is getting knocked a good thing? Or, as Jada says, "Since when is it cool to get shot and not shoot back?" Somebody needs to explain to me why the hip hop fans worry about how real these artists are when the larger majority of them never touched weight in their life. Shouldn't the emphasis be on the flow, lyrical strength and the overall ability to keep the listener interested for an entire album?

Not to say that this falls solely on the audience though. Its not like the artist are not playing right into it. For instance, we can look at the Game or Lil Wayne. Wayne, a new found affiliate of the Bloods, has been signed to Cash Money since he was 11. He's been shot, (by himself of course) which is seemingly mandatory now-a-days ("niggas is acting like slugs is awards and they proud to get em"). Yet, he portrays this gangsta image when the hip-hop community would probably accept him more wholeheartedly if he came out real. How about the Game? Also a new found affiliate, gets a tattoo of a butterfly on his face as a symbolic representation of his Grandmother. That is not the problem. The problem is that a real G would have keep it there instead of quickly covering it up with a LA sign and now a red star once he got a taste of the ridicule. (Side note: tattoos on your face might be the sign of the lowest educated members of society, I mean, its your face!)

I say that to say this: Hip Hop is resurrecting itself. The whole Hip Hop is dead campaign has really swept through the game. Fact is, Hip Hop is healing itself. We are beginning to weed out the bullshit. Hip Hop isn't dead, but record sales are. And if you look back at the beginning of this whole shit, record sales were not up in the millions. In fact, the whole problem started when we began to determine the value of an artist based on there first week sales. That's the germ that started this whole Hip Hop is Dead epidemic. But Hip Hop isn't dead. I would call this the great depression of Hip Hop. All we need now is the rap version of FDR to come through and new deal this bitch! Bad news though, its not Lil Wayne or Kanye West. Sadly, its not this new blood of Papoose or Joell Ortiz. More then likely, the savior is yet to be discovered.

But fact is, the rappers of today need to realize that ignorance is not the way to the top. Maybe for a ring tone deal or something, but not for sustained longevity in this game. While I enjoy the "I'm so Hood remix" as much as the next man, its just not the representation of Hip Hop that we should be idolizing. As you get older, you begin to realize that a song with substance is far more stimulating then a song about moving weight with a catchy hook will ever be. When you can walk into your local high school and see a group of white girls humming the "I wear my pants below my waist...." shits gone sour. There is a huge difference between a "Can't Knock the Hustle" and "5000 ones" or between "Everyday Struggles" and "I'm so hood". At least I think so.

Basing your opinion of an artist, hip hop or otherwise, on their credibility outside their respective genres or based on the popularity of there work, is shortsighted to say the least. It's also the characteristics of the weak minded and immature. Denzel, Dr. Dre and Kobe were all once local hype with little support. Now, you could argue they are the best at what they do. So, let these dumb rappers weed themselves out. If these hip hop fans truly give a shit, stop supporting the mindless bullshit overflowing youtube and flooding you local radio station. Supporting fake shit by fake thugs....what part of the game is that?

Wednesday, January 23, 2008

The super bowl

Those Giants made it in. No thanks to the stellar performance of their shitty kicker. I thought the Giant fans would get the same bitter taste in their mouth that my faithful Jets gave me when their kicker missed those FG's in Pittsburgh a few years back. Luckily, the Giants D has been holding shit down. Also, that Bradshaw kid can run the ball and mixes in well with the brick shit house Brandon Jacobs. Also, Plaxiglass seems like he is magically healed from the injury that has "plagued" him all year. That is a good sign. Too bad cheater Bill is going to expose just how bad Eli is. The more time without the ball in the hands of Eli, the better for Giant fans. Sure, he has been playing mistake free this postseason, but there is more to winning super bowls then just not making mistakes. Either way, win or lose, Eli still sucks! If that guys doesn't hold the recessive down syndrome gene, then the sky ain't blue.

The worst part about this whole shit show, is now I have to sit around for two weeks listening to the Giant fans tell me how close the last game of the season was. While the score sure does reflect a close game, many people conveniently forget the 2 fluke TD's the Giants got. First, the kickoff return by some guys named Hixon, and the second at the end of the game during prevent defense "junk time". Take those two scores away, and the final is 38-21. Also, the Pats made 3 trips to the red zone which led to FG's. I think we all know that not getting in the end zone is a rarity for the Pats.

Oh, and what about the pressure. The Giants were playing for their shot at history with that last game. If they win, they knock off the undefeated team. If they lose, they were supposed to. This time, the pressure is equal.

The media will continue to point to the last game of the season as the turning point for the G-men. You know the Pats are good when losing to them is your teams highlight. I do not doubt the turn around in the Giants. Going into Tamps, Dallas & the Ice Shit house in Wisconsin is no easy task. They are playing some promising football. But, we cannot assume the momentum to belong to the Giants. Remember that ole 18-0 record, that defines momentum.

Then there is the boot. All of a sudden, Tom Brady was seen sporting some sort of air cast. If you ask me, he is just doing it for the bitches. Now, when he throws 5 touchdowns in the Superbowl, the media can slurp him off about how he did it on an injured foot. I hope fucking Strahan breaks his fucking leg off!

I am torn because I want to see the Giants win, just to rep the State, but I also want to see them get blown out. I think the reasoning for that second wish is multi-tier. First, I have been watching these Patriot duchebags all year with this fucking perfect season shit, I just want it to be completed. This way, I don't have to hear about how good the Florida smart fish were in 72 or the tenacious D of the 85 bears. I can look at all those old fucks and say that the best team of all time is from this generation, fueled with HGH, steroids, the Pacman Jones' and dog slayers, but this generation nonetheless. Also, I want to be able to look at the faces of the disappointed Giant fans and see them feeling a small piece of what a Jet fan deals with each year.

You may say I'm being a hater, but the fact remains, the Giants will not win. They got smoked by the Vikings! Also, check the stats of the Patriots under cheater Bill when he has two weeks to prepare. All I'm saying is: Giant fans should just be happy to be here, but this is where the road ends. Any given Sunday, yea I know. But not Sunday February 3rd for the G-men.

Tuesday, January 22, 2008

Check me out Bitches

Whats up people,
As you can see, I found me a Blog to jumble my bullshit on. Every so often, as work becomes tiresome, I will come to these pages and vent. Sometimes about current topics, sometimes about sports, and sometimes about nothing. Either way, check me out!